The biggest, chubbiest little bundle of joy you've ever seen

If Football Doesn’t Work Out

Have you ever seen a soccer cut? And by soccer cut I mean a crazy, European, futbal-playing mullet. Lots of party in the back and faux hawk in the front. Kyle had one around age 5. Like father, like son I guess.  It gets better and better every day.

Soccer Cut

Soccer Cut + Tummy


The Benefits of Being Fat

Owen 017.CRWOwen apparently looks like a mini football player.  Can’t you see it?  Broad shoulders. Big tummy.  Defensive tackle anyone? Multiple people have started to recruit him to play college football.  Auburn, Nebraska, Vandy.  Offers will be vetted thoroughly. I’m thinking Ivy League. Don’t be fooled by the rolls, he’s also one smart cookie!


The Problem with Pants


My son has a big problem. There are no pants that fit him. The tyranny of our culture says that when a baby is 6-9 months old he will be able to fit into a certain size and when he is 12-18 months old he will inevitably have long legs. Owen unfortunately does not have long legs and thus, cannot wear pants. We have plus size for adults. Where’s the fat baby store?   So yes, I am that mom with the kid in just a onesie at Target….and the park….and Church…and the opera. (Owen’s very cultured) His two pairs of pants consist of 18 month-old board shorts that end up looking kind of like man-pris and the pair above, some hand-me-downs from a friend with a very nicely worn out waistband stretched just enough to accommodate a very big tummy.  But, alas, when the pants come on we encounter a new problem: shirts.



Mobile…And in No Danger of Slimming Down

Wherever I go people always say to me, “Oh, what a fat baby you have! But don’t worry, as soon as he starts moving, the pounds will just melt off.” Well, Owen started crawling a week ago and as this photo reveals…there is no chance he has less rolls. In fact, I think I count an extra one on his tummy compared to his six month photo. Image


This one is for Rachel


I had to make a post because our nanny, Rachel Rohm, took some awesome pictures of us right before we moved out of our old house. Here she truly captured the essence of my big fat baby, including multiple chins! Way to go Rachel. Thank you!DSC_1870

And this on too. Look at those rolls!

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I love me some shorty short overalls

I love me my shorty short overalls

Are you supposed to see tummy rolls through overalls?


Thinking deeply about my next meal


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Three zucchini sticks are never enough.

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More Rolls Than a Cinnabon

6 month birthday!

Nom nom nom nom nom nom.


The intent of this blog…

…is simply to post pictures of my baby. I happen to have a really fat, smiley (read: awesome) baby whose amplitude and adorableness have yet to be rivaled on the Internet. Therefore, I thought I’d share him with the world…or the five people who want to look at his pictures all day (hi mom).

The contest is…I challenge you to find a picture of a baby fatter than mine. It hasn’t happened yet.